Dear mind

Stop trying to protect me. I know the possibilities and I know what might happen. It's clearly written out for me and I don't want to see another positive possibility. It's unfair of you to leave me ignorant and feeling remorseful after each realization because it just hurts that much.

So stop it.

We as humans have the ability of foresight and thus I have already come up with a slight plan. How it will work out, I am not sure. But I will hope for the best and do what I can. I wish I did have those miraculous healing abilities that does wonders without having to toy around with chemicals; just our minds.

It's so ironic. And I hate it. I hate how past words are coming back and making me realize what I thought about. I wish I never have and that's the irony of it. I just wish I knew the significance of it when I was thinking of those words.

Not all of it was bad though. My grade 5/6 teacher once said that we only remember the bad things in life and I half heartedly agree. I also hated him, his wife, and his pretensions children. Fuck off you little assholes or I'll throw my neatly placed pencil crayons at you. The only good thing that I remember from that teacher was that he said I learned multiplication fast. But don't give yourself too much credit you asswipe (who probably wishes he was an exhibitionist- I mean who wears such short shorts and a speedo in front of his 12 year old students?), it was my mother (who secretly wishes she was an accountant) who clarified things for me. My dad taught me division because you were too engrossed in your fucken bull legs and preaching about what not to eat.

Okay so he had a point. Memories of anger are pretty prevalent but I hope the good ones or at least intentionally good ones are enough to keep you here. Despite all of the shit and feelings of rejection that become uprooted, it just would not be the same.

Stay.

And in exchange, I'll take all of the bad memories. After all, I am the only bitter one.